untitled post of shame

I almost re-blogged Taylor Swift’s tumblr post today. I decided against it. I have no idea why. Maybe it would have been funny, but probably not in the way I would have intended. “Oh look, is he re-posting Taylor Swift to be funny? Ironic? Is he making a statement about the banality of social media and the state of the internet?” No, it wouldn’t have been any of those things. She starts off the video saying, “Hey guys, it’s Taylor…” or something like that. I found that funny because everyone knows who the fuck Taylor Swift is, even if you don’t really know dick about her. I know who the fuck Taylor Swift is. Though it’s not because I’m a fan of hers, but rather because she’s everywhere. She’s like Justin Bieber, though less easy to make fun of. She’s popular, yet boring. She’s a great role model for young girls because she’s cute, yet charmingly asexual. I don’t believe we should continue to shield our children from sex, but at least Swift gives them a role model whose not dripping with sexual juices. She’s like a perpetual teenager despite being 24 years old. She’s successfully doing everything Brittany Spears failed to do. I assume she has every boyfriend sign a goddamn confidentiality agreement. Am I still writing about Taylor Fucking Swift???

I suppose I mention her because of something I am noticing in myself. I’ve been seeing an acceptance growing. I used to scoff at the absurdity of videos exactly like the one she posted. I’m more okay with it than I used to be. I like seeing other people’s enthusiasm for things, regardless of how pointless. Well, “like” may be a strong word. I suppose I find them more interesting than I used to. In his podcast, Penn Jillette often speaks of his love to hear people proselytize. I’m finding I do more and more as well. I have to say, though, that it depends if those beliefs aren’t incredibly ignorant, racist, full of bigotry, etc. Those kinds beliefs can be interesting to hear, yet incredibly frustrating at the same time. The sad and frustrating part is that usually the people who hold them are immovable in those horrible beliefs. At least Taylor Swift is only talking about how much she likes Tumblr. Horaaaaaaay. I just want her to post one video where she says “I miss John Mayer’s cock sometimes.” That would be amazing.



So in case anyone missed it, it’s Halloween. It’s the most important thing on the planet right now because I’ve seen zero coverage of anything else. The world must be at peace right now. I’m sitting here while “Today” with Kathie Lee and Hoda Kotb airs in the background. We’re ten minutes into a bit at the moment where they’re doing their show as Wayne and Garth from Wayne’s World. It is literally blanking out my brain. I understand that any television after 7 or 8am is considered daytime TV anymore. I get it. These shows are trying to appeal to stay-at-home moms. Our culture is more about what people claim to want, and not about what they need to hear. What we need in in-depth reporting on important issues. What we get is a gloss-over before 7 or 8am. We’re shown afterward are stories about fall fashion and coffee enemas. I reminisce to the days where Katie Couric got a colon screening on live television. Am I joking right now? Tweet or comment with the hashtag #Katiescolon and tell me what you think!



TL;DR: If you’re left thinking, “What the fuck was that blog post about?” don’t worry. So am I.

STL;DR: Taylor Swift digs anal… screenings for cancer, because colon cancer is no laughing matter.

IHTASOAN; DR: I just mentioned Taylor Swift, (multiple times), and Justin Bieber in my blog. What the fuck is going on?? Maybe once the sterilization effect of this shitty shitty daytime television wears off I’ll write about something more meaningful. I owe everyone a fucking book after missing yesterday and the abortion-worthy entry of today.

"I have a pretty little colon!" - Katie Couric